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2003-06-10 10:15 p.m.
mixed up
Spent a while on the phone today with Stuart. Told him pretty much everything. Why. I don't know. Do I feel better. A little. I think. I don't know. I still have this burning desire to just let him read all of this [paper diary] while I go for a walk. But scared. It will change everything. For the better, or for the worse. It doesn't matter which - everythings changed, regardless. Feel so mixed up right now Sarah suggested Youth Hostels for my holiday. Much much cheaper. Means I can choose somewhere cheap, quiet and far, far away from everything. Things seem to be looking up for Stuart though. <........> But right now - I feel nothing.
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